so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
You have to summon your inner elephant
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize