We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
