either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Randomize
