He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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