those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
he was CRYING into my vagina
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Randomize
