Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
