Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize
