his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
