he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize