dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
