well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
