my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
