The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
her vagine was all disorganized.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
