I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
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His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
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I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
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