His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
