I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
