Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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