It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I party with great urgency now.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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