I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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