I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
