is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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