I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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