Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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