I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize