Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
