Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Randomize
