So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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