It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
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