He is an equal opportunity slut.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Randomize
