A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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