Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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