she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
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