try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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