note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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