you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
