I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Randomize
