I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
