Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
