OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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