wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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