Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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