It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize