I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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