Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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