I got chris browned last night
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize
