idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
