maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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