I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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