Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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