Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
