i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
